Stop saying you’re fine and say this instead
Have you ever noticed that when someone asks you the question ‘How are you?’ that you quickly say ‘I’m fine, thanks!’. Sometimes you really mean it and other times it rolls off your tongue like a default response, devoid of any emotion or sometimes even truth. From personal experience this was and sometimes still is my default response.
But it’s time to change that.
I recently stumbled upon a beautiful affirmation book that was written by Spiritual teacher Iyanla Vanzant several years ago but the messages definitely still hold true today. Our words have power. They are the gateway to our thoughts, our emotions and also can define the journey ahead of us.
Think about the times when you weren’t feeling fine but you shrank your feelings anyway. How would it have felt to share how you were feeling or how you wanted to feel instead?
I’m not a big fan of the phrase ‘fake until you make it’ because really who wants to be fake? Instead of suppressing or hiding who you are, change your behaviours and set intention with everything that you do.
So let’s swap faking it with this quote by Dr. Johnnie Coleman. ‘Act the way you want to be and soon you will be the way you act.’
Here is an excerpt from Iyanla’s book Acts of Faith: Meditations For People of Color that I would like to leave with you today:
So the next time someone says “How are you?”, try this one on for size: I am whole. I am complete. I am perfect. I am happy. I am dynamite. I am lovable, getting lots of good love. I am well off and doing well. I have it all together. I am basking in the riches of life. I am prospering right here and right now. I am being richly rewarded, even in my sleep. I am a miracle worker expecting a miracle right now. I am successful. I am wealthy. I am living by pure grace. I am a believer. I am standing on faith. I am on my way to the top. I am what I am because I just can’t help myself.
And how are you doing, my dear?
Now how’s that for a response?
So my advice to you is this: Embrace your awesome. Set intention behind everything that you do and remember that it’s ok to admit that you’re not fine if you’re really aren’t.
But if you are feeling great, own it and be proud to share your fabulous energy with the world. Don’t do it because you think you have to.
You should do it because you’re worth it.
And because you are so awesome and I love Iyanla’s affirmation so much, I made a special recording for you so you can listen to this message and use it as your personal pick me up. You can check it out and download it on my Sound Cloud Page or listen to it below.
Over to you.
What you noticed that you say the phrase ‘I’m fine, thanks’ a lot? If you do, is it a true reflection of how you feel or has it become your default response?
Read More »Is social media bad for our health? Here’s how to find out
With over 1.06 billion monthly active users, Facebook is definitely a social network that is here to stay for awhile. Although it’s one of the biggest platforms, it doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of the number of ways (Twitter, Youtube, Pinterest and more) that we can use social media to get online and stay connected.
Nowadays it feels like the new normal is chronicling our lives for our ‘virtual friends’ and ‘followers’ over various social platforms. The way we receive our news, entertainment and even connect with each other has changed.
Don’t get me wrong, social media has tremendous benefits. I’ll be the first to admit that. I’ve met people who will undoubtedly be lifelong friends just through Twitter alone. However, we’ve gotta keep it real and also acknowledge that there are some downsides which are becoming the norm as of late.
Over the last few months I’ve become more aware of my own use of social media and find myself pulling back from logging on just for the sake or pulling out my phone to document life moment by moment.
Does this sound familiar? People engaged in conversation with their ‘virtual friends’ and ‘followers’ via their smart phones instead of talking to the people in front of them. The constant urge to check your profile, document your movements, your body, your outfits, your food or even your relationship?
Yes social media can be fun. But I have to wonder sometimes if there is a risk of losing ourselves in the process sometimes. Various studies have started popping up about things such as ‘Facebook Envy’ and the stress of trying to make yourself look perfect online.
Recently I read a line from a book by formo Cosmo editor Kate White called I Shouldn’t Be Telling You This: Success Secrets Every Gutsy Girl Should Know that inspired me to create a quick video to share my thoughts on our new normal. Check it out below and weigh on with your thoughts
Click here if you are viewing this post from a smartphone to watch the video
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Over to You
Now that you’ve watched the video, share your thoughts to the question. Have you found yourself evaluating your own use of social as of late too? Share in the comments below.
Photo Credit: Jaako via Compfight cc
Read More »Healthy Dose of Good Reads | Edition #4
Happy Friday Folks! Excited to share Edition #4 of Good Reads from the interwebs on fitness, nutrition and self care. In this issue we’ve got some motivation to run your own race, how to manage stress and tips to finally break free from self-sabotage.
:: EAT ::
If you live in the US and don’t have a Vitamix & want one, read this post!
Vitamix Giveaway | Simple Green Smoothies
:: MOVE ::
There is no such thing as a slow run. Great post from Renewed Fitness
I’m a “Slow” Runner and I’m Ok With That | Renewed Fitness
:: LOVE ::
An inspiring post by an even more inspiring woman:
Change Room Anxiety | The Misadventures of a Darwinian Fail
We reach for self sabotage when we fear our own empowerment:
Self Sabotage is a Bitch | Owning Pink
Honoured to be mentioned in this post:
What do you do when the world knocks you down | Tash Jefferies
:: IN CASE YOU MISSED IT ::
My interview with my friend and Stress Management Expert Tash Jefferies on how to manage stress:
How to manage stress in your life – Interview with Tash Jefferies
What are some of your ‘good reads’ from this week? Share in the comments below!
Read More »How to manage stress in your life – Interview with Tash Jefferies
“I am so stressed!”
Hands up if you’ve found yourself saying that a lot more than you care to admit. Or maybe you’re quick to see the signs of stress in others
than in yourself. Over time, key signs or ‘stressors’ become more difficult to recognize, they become entrenched in our life or we flat out ignore them.
When stress becomes an everyday occurrence, it’s time to sit up and take notice because its only a matter of time before it has a detrimental effect on your health, career and quality of life. Even though we have more sobering reports that we are more stressed out than ever, it doesn’t have to be that way.
In today’s episode of Love Yourself to Healthy TV, I reached out to my friend and Stress Management Expert Tash Jefferies to share her wisdom on how to manage or eliminate stress in your life.
So grab a pen and jot down some notes on how to manage stress in your life and get connected to what really matters.
:: Click to Tweet This ::
Interview Highlights
- What is a lifestyle cheerleader and how is it different from a coach? [1:55]
- Why it’s important for you to do the work when making life changes [5:20]
- Tash’s thoughts on why technology and social media consumption may be contributing to our stress levels [9:55]
- Why Tash makes meal times a ‘technology free’ zone [10:50]
- Tash’s 4 tips for stress management and minimizing it in your life [13:42]
Sites & Resources Mentioned in this Interview
- Tash and Chivon’s Weekly Webshow Hot N Holistic (Live on Monday’s at 6pm EST)
About Tash Jefferies – Stress Management Expert, Lifestyle Cheerleader
Lifestyle Cheerleader. Stress Expert. No matter what you call her, she is a woman who is dedicating her life to helping people live 
vibrantly, fully self-expressed, and true to who they are.
Her work includes public speaking, teaching, consulting, in the areas of stress management, relationships, healthy living, personal branding, and entrepreneurship.
She is the best-selling author (of The Little Book of Green Minutes), and was recently named by Huffington Post as one of Canada’s Top 50 Health Tweeters. She is also an advocate for holistic practices, and a reiki practitioner.
With over 15 years experience within sales and marketing throughout industries ranging from pharmaceuticals to management consulting, she has the confidence to provide insight to anyone who needs it.
After having her own struggles with health, work/life balance, passion and purpose, she chooses to make her life’s mission that of teaching others how to find their own place of success, peace and freedom.
Connect with Tash
Read More »
